How are YOU doing lately?
How are YOU doing lately?
If you're anything like me, you're struggling because way too many people have become way too shitty.
Lots of people have always been shitty, but lots MORE that didn't used to be shitty are shitty now, and I'm not sure if this is some sort of Covid backlash or some Trump inspired wave of suddenly outted dumbassery.
Case in point….
A company started printing "money" with Donald Trump's face on it (they called it "Trump Bucks"). For $99 you could buy a $10,000 bill that was advertised as redeemable at "most banks, including JPMorgan Chase, Bank of America and Wells Fargo". When buyers visited these branches they were shocked to be told that it wasn't legal tender.
“Now I realize, well, that was stupid. I bought them because I believed President Trump, because he knows all about finance, and he was going to help the real Trump Patriots get rich”
—Alabama* Grandmother
* You are shocked she’s from Alabama, right?
When I heard this a part of my soul just died because this is the type of stupid that can never be rectified. This is the global warming of stupid. Because like global warming it's too late to do anything about it. We had our chance and failed. Blame Betsy Devos and her grizzlies or Mark Zuckerberg or Fox News or the state of Florida or all the Marvel movies or maybe the ridiculous cost of a college education. Blame the fact that while the stupids whistle blithely past these aforementioned graveyards, they've become convinced that beer, books, and shopping at Target can turn you gay, and have taken to social media to fight this war....in an attempt to own one woke lib at a time.
At least one of these "Trump Cash" people is actually suing.....and I suddenly feel for whoever their lawyer is. That lawyer, surely at one point a young, idealistic warrior intent on taking down mob bosses or something, is instead now face to face with the dumbest person on the planet. This lawyer will have to stand up in court and make a legal argument that says, essentially, that the depth of human stupidity is so vast that even dog food will now require a disclaimer.
We've doomed. We've passed the point of no return. This is why shampoo bottles still have directions on them. These people will be stupid until they day they die. They probably have a pack of stupid kids at home who will carry on the legacy. This type of stupid is surely entertaining, but only up to a point. Eventually it veers wildly towards terrifying, because this is exactly the demographic who become members of Congress.
So yea, I'm struggling. It's exhausting. Dealing with these people on a daily basis is like going for a walk on the heritage trail, sans bug spray, and being dive-bombed by gnats.
So I ask you again. How are YOU doing?
Not that I am a genius by any means. I am dumb in so many ways that I've lost count. But I am not dumb in the brutish "Target will make you gay" way or the "shoot Bud Light cans with my AR15" way. I am dumb with cars and with things that break and putting furniture together and with managing money and remembering where I parked. I am dumb in an absent-minded sort of way.....the sort of dumb that seeks to do no harm ever….other than to exasperate those who are forced to live with me. Despite my dumbness I accept everybody….except the ones who make too much noise when I am sitting outside and the ones who insist on shooting off fireworks once they get past the age of 12. And Nazis. I do not tolerate Nazis. Other than this, you can drink what you want and shop where you want and love who you want and identify as what you want and I actively encourage you to read all the banned books you can get your hands on. Because never have I heard of some drag queen fired up by the subliminal messages of “The Grapes of Wrath” grabbing a just purchased AR15 and shooting up the local school.
And so much for all that. Try to educate yourself. Grab a banned book list from Florida and read ‘em all. That’s a good place to start.
If history makes you uncomfortable, you are certainly on the right track. Dig it out. Excavate. Learn from it. Help ensure that we don’t make the same mistakes again.
If you seek to suppress history because it’s ugly, I’ve got some Trump Bucks to sell you.
In a bit…
—tf
Thanks for reading. I do this a few times a week, and would love it if you became a paid subscriber. I only ask $5 a month. Last night I bought a pint of Sam Adams Summer Ale at the bar and it cost $5.50
I’m cheaper than beer, in other words.