"Honestly, satire loses its sting when it needs to be googled...."

So a guy who climbed Mount Fuji outside of its official climbing season had to be rescued via helicopter on Tuesday when he somehow lost his crampons, which are the spikes attached to your boots to give you the traction required to be on Mount Fuji in the first place. This is a bit like a golfer reaching the first tee of Augusta National Golf Course and realizing he doesn’t have any golf balls, and by itself would be dumb enough to make the news. Yet the kid did things one better a few days later when he had to be rescued AGAIN after climbing BACK up the mountain to retrieve his cell phone. Once again he came down with extreme altitude sickness, and once again he nearly died.